Just An Act
by Spider-Man Super-Fan
Summary: Peter Parker has been sort of depressed after what happened with Gwen. Luckily he meets the Avengers, but will they see through his act and help him, or will they not notice? After The Amazing Spider-Man 2 I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

New York is bathed in a orange, gold glow from the setting sun, as modern skyscrapers reach the clouds in an attempt to be the tallest.

A refreshing breeze can be felt on my face, and in the distance below, the traffic can be heard.

Something about this calms me.

I take a deep breath, absorbing the beauty, and run a hand through my short, brown hair.

Looking down at myself, I spot the red and blue spandex suit I am wearing, with patterns of webbing across the red and a symbolic spider in the middle.

It is covered with rips and is turned black from smoke from the previous fights I had stopping robbers and house fires.

It feels unusual to be back fighting crime after the months I was away.

I know I needed that break, I'm just not sure I made a good decision starting again, I'm not sure I'm ready to move on, but for the sake of the city, I did it anyway.

After what happened with Gwen I needed to stop being Spiderman and even though it has been a while, everything I say, and everything I do, brings me back to when she was alive.

I just wish things could go back to the way they were, but for that to happen, Gwen would have to be breathing.

She was the love of my life and whenever I think about her, or the incident, it leaves tears in my eyes.

I sigh in defeat, realising that no matter what, I will never be able to forget her.

As a single tear rolls down my face I try to stop myself from thinking about it too much, it's a beautiful night, and I don't want to ruin it.

A sudden scream leaves me jumping to my feet.

I grab my red mask and put it on.

My mask gives me confidence, also it lets me hide my true broken self.

I am not afraid to admit it, I am depressed.

After loosing the one person you love, who wouldn't be?

Especially if all you seem to be able to do is blame yourself, but when I am wearing the mask, I am not broken Peter Parker, I am the joke loving, Amazing Spider-man.

I leap off the building, enjoying the free falling before, at the last minute, catching myself using the specially designed web shooters I invented and swinging away.

I make my way towards the cry for help and do an occasional flip in the air.

When I arrive I spot a man all in black and a young women trying her best to keep her distance from him.

I perch myself on top of a wall and take a minute to watch the scene.

"Just give me the bag and I won't hurt you," the man threatened with gritted teeth.

I decide now is as good a time as any to interfere.

"Hey, creepy, robber person, why would she want to give the bag to you? I know your a mugger, or whatever, but that doesn't mean you can tell her what to do."

The woman looks up at me startled but, when she notices my costume, her eyes fill with fear.

Ever since last week, when Spider-man returned, people have been saying I was the one that murdered Captain Stacy and Gwen.

The police have even started shooting at me again, it will only be a matter of time before they manage to hit me.

The mugger gets so scared, he trips on his feet and falls backwards.

I can not help but snort at that.

"Okay, now that was easier than expected," I say, webbing him to the ground before he has the chance to get back up.

The woman stares at her shoes, afraid I might do something to her.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you," she looks up at me in confusion, but nods and scurries out of the alleyway.

I quickly jump back in the air and swing away.

I reach my peaceful neighbourhood and swing directly into the open window of my house.

Closing the window, I look around seeing the dirty clothes, spread across the room that I'm too lazy to clean up.

"Peter is that you?" a familiar voice calls out from downstairs.

"Uh, yeah it's me Aunt May," I reply.

I hear her feet on the wooden floor boards moving towards my direction, "Can I come in?"

"Wait, just give me a couple of seconds," I say hopping on one foot, trying to put some clothes ontop of my suit.

"Ok," I call out after unlocking my door.

Aunt May opens the door and steps inside, frowning at the clothes scattered around.

"You should clean your room you know," I grin sheepishly, "do you want any dinner? I'm making spaghetti."

"No thank you, I'm not really hungry," I respond quietly, already knowing what she is going to say next.

"Peter, you haven't eaten anything in days, you can't live like this," concern is showing in her voice, and I feel bad about worrying her, but I am just not hungry, or maybe I just ignore the hunger.

I sigh, "I'm going to go to bed, goodnight Aunt May."

"Goodnight Peter," she silently walks downstairs.

I sigh once more, deciding what to do now, it's 7:00pm, might as well try to get some sleep.

I jump onto my bed, not bothering to change into my pyjamas.

"Goodnight Gwen," I whisper before I close my eyes and let dark, peace take over, or something like that anyway.

 _I'm at a clock tower, it's dusty brick walls layered in moss are way to familiar._

 _Looking down between the falling gears and parts I notice a woman, she is gorgeous, with straight blond hair and sky blue eyes._

 _Gwen._

 _Sadness, fear, doubt and something else, regret, it is all clearly visible on her face._

 _Everything is in slow motion, I shoot a web and watch as it moves._

 _It reaches out and grabs her before she hits the ground, but it's too late._

 _Her lifeless body hangs as I land next to her._

 _I sit there as I let tears cascade down my face, it's happening all over again._

 _Captain Stacy steps out of the shadows with a disappointed expression._

 _"Why didn't you save her? Why didn't you listen?!" his voice is rising with each word._

 _"I... I tried, I couldn't," I whisper, more trying to convince myself than anyone else._

 _"All you do is kill."_

 _"no."_

 _"Uncle Ben, me and now Gwen. You didn't even try and save us."_

 _"No, no, I didn't want this to happen. I loved Gwen, I would never want her dead."_

 _"The world is better off without you, nobody would miss you anyway, just give up, again."_

 _"No, no! NO!"_

With a sudden jolt I find myself back in my bedroom sitting on my bed.

My heart is racing and my face is pale.

Why won't this nightmare ever go away, every time I sleep, every time I close my eyes, even every time I blink, I see her falling.

I sink my head into my pillow and cry all night long as I fail to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

As the sunlight peaks through the sides of my curtain, I get out of bed and head to the bathroom.

Splashing some cold, ice water on my face, I hope to wash away the salty tears from the night before, but in reality all I really want it to do is wash away the memories.

I head downstairs after getting dressed in a red hoodie and blue jeans, above my Spider-man suit.

The smell, of bacon and eggs, draws me into the kitchen, where I notice Aunt May is sitting with one plate of it in front of her, and the other at a spot next to her.

I sit down on the couch, ignoring the plate of food clearly meant for me, and Aunt May almost jumps out of her seat when she notices me.

"Peter, before Gwen... a few months ago, you would sleep till 10:00 on the weekend, I'm still not used to this," she says trying to lighten the mood.

"Sorry Aunt May," I say sadly.

"Would you like some eggs and bacon?" she asks hopefully, pointing towards the plate.

"No thanks Aunt May," I turn down her offer.

"Peter, I don't care what you say right now, you are eating this," she says sternly.

I walk over to the plate and pick it up, taking a small bit of bacon and nibbling on the edge of it.

Aunt May looks at me, but frowns when she sees me empty the bacon and eggs into the bin on the way outside.

"I'm going for a walk," I say setting down the plate on the kitchen counter and heading for the door.

"Of course Peter, goodbye."

"Bye," I close the door and head for an ally, I hate being Spider-man, with the police firing at me and the public being scared of me, but I do it anyway.

Once I get there, I take off my civilian clothes to reveal the Spiderman suit.

Using my web shooters, I stick my backpack and skateboard to a wall, that way, if someone found it they won't be able to get the webbing off and take it.

I swing around the city so I can spot danger, after I quickly put my mask on.

I notice some commotion and land in the middle of it.

Around me, cops are pointing their guns at a burglar, but sadly, the burglar has a small pistol too.

Stepping in front of the cops, I look the burglar straight in the eye.

"Are you gonna drop the gun?" I ask impatiently.

"Why would I? I can just shoot you and run away," He replies with confidence.

"Okay then, give it your best shot."

With his gun in hand, he raises it towards me, and pulls the trigger.

Soon everything is as it if is in slow motion, giving me plenty of time to side step the bullet.

"Is that all you've got?" I laugh.

"I don't have time for you!" He shouts back, aiming the gun instead towards a woman, that can't help but make me think of Gwen as she also has the lovely blond hair and blue eyes.

I think about the events at the clock tower and become determined to make sure this girl lives.

"I'll shoot her if you don't let me get away," my eyes widen at that sentence, luckily he can't see through my mask.

"Now let's not do anything drastic."

"Get away, I will shoot!"

I take one more step forwards and he pulls the trigger just as I web him to the wall.

Looking towards the woman, I run with unnatural speed and push her out of the way.

I lay on the floor and feel a terrible pain in my thigh.

Looking towards it I see a large patch and puddle of blood.

"Well that's just great," I say, pain showing in my voice.

I decide to add a thick layer of webbing to my wound, hoping to stop the bleeding.

Looking towards the robber I can see that the police are handling it, but his smug expression shows me that he knows that he managed to shoot me.

Some police are coming towards me, most likely going to arrest me, so I don't give them a chance and leave.

Struggling to make my way home, I collapse on the roof of a building nearby.

I lay there for a moment, in to much pain to make a move.

The sudden sound of footsteps behind me gets me to jump, out of the small puddle of blood that had formed on the ground, and to my feet, which I regret doing because of the pain, but I don't let it show.

A man in a silver suit with four extra metal arms comes towards me.

I tilt my head sideways and make a confused face at the mysterious man, "And who are you?"

"Dr Otto Octavius,"

"We've never met before, the names Spider-man, what do you go by? Doctor Octopus? I think that's what I'll call you."

"Mmmm," he says irritated.

"Ok, so are you meant to be a villain or a hero, or maybe just some random person?"

"I am your worst nightmare."

"No, I don't think that's possible," I mumble not letting him hear.

He shoots an arm towards me but I dodge it just in time.

Pain shoots through me, from the bullet in my leg, and I fall to my knees.

"Urgh," I groan.

"Hm, it seems you are injured, that makes defeating you much easier," he says, only just noticing my wound.

"Just great," I say aloud, getting to my feet once more.

I shoot two webs towards him and before I can throw him against something, he grabs hold of the webs and swings me into a building nearby.

The glass shatters and I realise where I am.

I get to my feet and walks towards the, now shattered, window, well aware of the little blood trail I left behind.

"Seriously, out of all the buildings you could throw me against, you chose Stark Tower, you know the Avengers live here right?"

I get no reply so I turn and face the, now gasping, Avengers, "Sorry," I say giving them an apologetic smile.

I then shoot a web and swing back to Doc Ock, yup, that's his new nickname.

I land back on the roof I was on before being sent into Stark Tower, and I kick him in the face.

"Urge!"

"What, you don't like that?" I taunt.

He keeps throwing punches towards me, and I can't help but admit I'm not doing so well.

I am injured after all.

Does that count as an excuse?

I get an idea and shoot a web to an electrical box nearby.

I quickly shoot a web towards Doc Ock and before he can react I press a button on my web shooters and scrunch up my eyes, knowing this is going to hurt me a lot more than him.

Electricity flows from the web attached to the box, through me, and at Doc Ock.

We both scream in pain and I watch as Doc Ock passes out.

After it stops, I wobble on my feet for a couple of seconds whilst my vision becomes blurry, before I fall to the ground unconscious.


	3. Chapter 3

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

 _I look around, I'm at the clock tower, again._

 _I look down, already knowing what is going to happen, but it is slightly different this time._

 _Gwen is falling, but she is speaking too._

 _"Peter, save me, don't let me fall, I don't want to die," tears are streaming down her face._

 _I am about to shoot a web, but I can't, I'm chained._

 _"Peter, why won't you save me? Just shoot a web, I though you loved me," her words are just whispers, but I can hear them clearly._

 _"I do love you, you mean everything to me, please don't die," now I am crying too, but Gwen doesn't seem to care._

 _"Then you should have kept your promise to my father, then I wouldn't be here."_

 _"No, I wanted to keep the promise, but I couldn't, you didn't want me to."_

 _"Are you saying that it's my fault?"_

 _"No, not at all, I just... just... wish it didn't have to be this way."_

 _"Then save me, let me live," her volume had never raised._

 _I desperately tried to move, but the chains would not break._

 _"Please, NO!" I scream as she hits the ground with a sickening crack._

I wake up with a start from another one of the nightmares, and notice I'm not in my room.

My breathing is heavy from the dream, but that doesn't stop me from looking around at where I am.

I am in a cream white room with one wall as a large window, I can see medical equipment scattered around the place.

I notice I am laying on a medical bed.

I look down and see I am still in my Spider-man suit, but the part where my thigh is, has a bandage around it.

I take off the bandage and see my wound is stitched up and has started to heal.

"How are you feeling?"

I spin my head around to see Bruce Banner leaning against a wall.

"Uh, I'm fine," I say trying to hide my breathing, "but where am I?"

"Stark tower," he says confirming my thoughts.

"Why am I here?" I question.

"Well, you passed out from the electricity and we couldn't really leave you on the roof nearby, especially as your leg was still bleeding, so I brought you here and stitched it up."

"The electricity alone couldn't have made me pass out, I didn't pass out when Electro electrocuted me, it must have been a combination of the pain from the bullet, lack of sleep and food, and the electricity," I mumble my thoughts out loud.

"What was that?" he asks.

"Oh, nothing," I answer.

"Are you sure you're ok? Your breathing is kind of heavy," great, he noticed.

"Oh, uh, well..." luckily I am interrupted by Tony Stark rudely barging in.

"Hey Bruce, how's it going?" he says walking in, but stops when he notices me, "Ah, I see, you're awake."

"No," I say sarcastically.

An awkward silence passes through the room; nobody knows what to say next.

"Well I'm gonna go," I say jumping off of the bed and to my feet, as pain shoots up my leg, but I ignore it.

"You need to rest," Bruce complains.

"No, I'm fine."

"Just stay and eat something," Bruce must have noticed how skinny I am.

"I'm not hungry," I really don't want to stay.

"Just come and meet the rest of the Avengers, after you left a trail of blood on the floor everyone was a bit worried," Tony says, finally deciding to speak.

"Fine, but not for long," I agree, already regretting it.

"Good, follow me," Tony says leading out of the room.

Bruce and I follow him, and end up in the common room, where all the Avengers are sitting around a table with sandwiches on plates in front of them.

They all turn to look at me.

"Uh, hi," I say waving awkwardly.

Captain America, without his mask, gestures to a chair beside him, "Would you like to take a seat?"

I nod, even though I would not, and sit down at the chair he gestured to.

"Steve Rogers," he says shaking my hand.

I look at the other people sitting at the table.

"Natasha Romanoff," says a girl with ginger locks I know as Black Widow.

"Clint Barton," Hawkeye says.

"Thor Odison!" Thor says, speaking louder than he has too.

"I didn't introduce myself before, I'm..."

"Bruce Banner, I know, I read one of your papers," he raises an eyebrow, "And you understood it?"

"Yeah," I reply.

"Well I bet you already know who I am," Tony says proudly.

"Um... no, not really," he frowns at that.

"The building's named after me," I am enjoying this.

"Stank?" I say, trying to get on his nerves.

"Stark, Tony Stark, you know, Stark Tower?"

"Oh, right!"

The others are either grinning or trying to hold in a chuckle.

"Here, you look hungry," Steve says putting a plate with a sandwich in front of me.

"Oh, uh thanks," I reply giving him a weak smile.

A few minutes go by of pointless, but fun, conversations between the Avengers and all I have done is poke at my sandwich.

"Well anyway I should get going now," I stand from my seat and start walking towards the open window, "See Ya!" I say before jumping out.

I know they are eyeing the uneaten sandwich questioningly, but I hope they won't think anything of it.

I change in the alleyway and start walking home.

When I reach my house, I knock on the door and wait.

Aunt May opens with a smile on her face.

"Peter, you're home," I nod and walk inside.

"I made chicken, would you like some?" she asks hopefully.

I think about it for a moment, I can eat some chicken and not be hungry anymore, or I can let myself pass out from hunger, pain or lack of sleep and finally get some rest.

"No thanks, I'll be upstairs," I reply, choosing the second option.

I make my way upstairs and collapse on my bed.

I lay there for a moment, my thigh is in a lot of pain, and so is the rest of my aching body.

I suppose I did not do much other than get myself shot in the leg, but that is the problem, I did not do much.

If I had done more, I wouldn't have gotten shot, if I had done more, I wouldn't be starving, and if I had done more, I might have even been able to save Gwen, and everyone else.

I pick up the picture frame of her by my dresser, and stare into her eyes.

Tears role down my face as I remember her beautiful laugh, the way she put her life at risk, to help me help others.

I wipe the tears away with my sleeve, and walk over to my bathroom, pyjama in hand.

Once there, I change and brush my teeth, crying over her toothbrush again, it may be something small, but having anything that used to be hers is special.

I stay in the bathroom, attempting to floss my teeth, when I finally pass out.

The way Gwen fell to her death haunts my dreams like every night.


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

I open my eyes and lift my head off the hard tiled floor.

I look around disappointed that I did not even make it to my bed, and spot the clock 7:08am.

Standing up I grab the clothes I wore yesterday, they are not that filthy, I can wear them again.

I walk downstairs and into the kitchen.

Pancakes are neatly piled on a plate in front of Aunt May, and my stomach rumbles at seeing them.

My aunt's head snaps in my direction after hearing the noise, "Would you like some?" she asks, taking her plate and bringing it to my nose.

I am about to object when I finally get a whiff of the smell and I realise just how hungry I really am.

My stomach feels like it is on fire and gives another pained growl.

I sigh in defeat and look at the floor before mumbling a quiet yes.

Aunt May rushes over to the counter and grabs another plate, towering rich, homemade pancakes onto it.

She shoves it in front of me, just after I take a seat at the table.

I count at least ten pancakes on the plate and smile, whatever chance Aunt May gets she will try to stuff me.

After about fifteen minutes of me shoving pancakes into my mouth, I head outside, giving Aunt May a hug and saying I love her, as usual, first.

I walk to an abandoned subway and take an old coin out of my bag, putting it in a slot, it fits perfectly.

The rusty floor breaks itself in two and a subway train comes out from under it.

I step inside, it seems strange as there is modern equipment neatly placed around the clean, polished room, whilst the outside looks like a dump.

I notice five very out of place objects, framed pictures of: Gwen, Aunt May, Uncle Ben, my mum Mary Parker and my dad Richard Parker.

They are the only people I ever cared about, except of course Harry, but he just brings back bad memories now.

I go to the counter and take off my web shooters.

I spend the next few hours tinkering with them, trying again and again to make them faster and stronger.

They have improved, not much, but they have.

Soon I am just sitting there, in my scruffy clothes, thinking about life.

I look over at the pictures again, taking the one of Gwen, after all her death stung the most.

Tears pool in my eyes and I take a sharp breath, trying not to let the tears spill.

I miss Gwen so much.

I can not control it anymore, the tears slide down my face freely.

What is the point anymore?

Why do I keep living?

I look over at the pictures, one of them reminds me why, Aunt May.

Without me no one will be there to keep her safe, she is my only reason to keep going.

Spider-man could be considered another reason, but I don't care much about him anymore.

I still want to help people, but the people are scared of me, I am even surprised the Avengers did not lock me up for murder of Gwen and Captain Stacey.

I slow down my crying as best I can, why do I always cry now?

It was always hard to make me cry, but since Gwen, a single reminder will leave me in tears.

I lift my wrist up to reveal my watch and realise it's already 12:58pm.

I put my suit on, deciding to go on a quick patrol before heading home for lunch.

The air brushes past my face and all around me I see blurs of colour, before smashing through a window in the side of a building.

"Hello everyone!" I exclaim in my happy Spider-man voice.

The two men turn to my direction, one freezes in fear when he sees me, and the other points his gun to me.

"Why is it always guns?" I rhetorically ask, jumping to the ceiling to avoid the spray of bullets.

Still on the ceiling I shoot a web to the frozen man and throw him into the other one.

They end up in a pile, soft groans heard as they regain consciousness, but before they can get up I web them in place.

"As fun as this has been," I say dropping to the floor, "I should go."

I shoot a web and come out the way I came in.

When I reach my neighbourhood, I look and see lots of police officers and an ambulance.

I quicken my pace and when I reach my house I am shocked, it is completely destroyed.

I see Aunt May on a stretcher, her eyes are closed and she is not moving.

I run up to her.

"Aunt May? Aunt May?" tears are now gathering in my eyes.

I turn to look at the police officer now standing next to me.

"What happened?" I question holding back the tears.

"That is not your business," he replies.

"That is my house!" when I say that he looks at me sadly, but then goes back to seeming emotionless.

"It was bombed," my heart beat stopped.

"Is my Aunt ok?" I feel sick to my stomach, dreading the answer.

"Luckily, she was on the opposite side of the house when it happened, but she seems to be in a coma now."

I let out a sigh of relief and let the tears fall freely.

Everyone close to me always gets hurt.

"Who did this," I ask between sobs.

"They think it's a pumpkin bomb, most likely from the Green Goblin, he did just escape prison along with the Rhino and Dr Octopus about 10 minutes ago, he must have come straight here."

That is when the tears stop, and all I feel is anger.

I wipe the salt off my face and stomp off into the distance, with a newfound sense of determination.


	5. Chapter 5

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

I run into an alleyway, and change into my Spider-man suit.

He must still be nearby, if he just left prison and came straight to my house, he could not have gotten far.

I swing out of the alley from a web, surveying the area when I spot the Goblin on his glider at the park.

I land on a tree shooting webs at the glider bringing it crashing to the ground, but it doesn't do much damage to Goblin.

"Ah, Peter, nice to see you again," he says with a devilish grin, luckily nobody is around to hear him calling my name, so I drop from the tree preparing for what I know is going to come next.

"Harry," I say through gritted teeth.

When I am around Goblin, my mask that hides my emotions is invisible.

Harry knows everything about me, he knows he hurt me, and I can not make it seem like he did not.

"I'm not Harry anymore, just the Green Goblin," he smiles wickedly holding a pumpkin bomb in his hand, pressing a small button on it and throwing it in my direction.

I attach some web to it and swing it at Goblin, it explodes in his face and he falls backwards, but gets back up.

"Why did you do it Harry?" tears are pooling in my eyes.

"Do what?" he asks playing dumb.

"Hurt her!" I scream.

"Which one?" he asks smirking.

"Ugh!" I attach webs to a tree, so I can pull it out of the ground and throw it at him with all my might.

The tree smacks him in the face before he can block it and he falls to the ground, clearly hurt this time, but he tries not to let it show.

"Did I hit a nerve?"

"Why won't you just leave them alone?!" I scream, I know I shouldn't let the anger control me, but I can't help it, "I'm your enemy, not them, they are not a part of this," I web him and spin him around before letting go so he hits another tree.

"Oh Peter, I just needed your blood, I was dying, but you didn't give it to me, you betrayed me!"

"I did it to keep you safe! I didn't know what my blood would do to you!"

"You betrayed me, and because of that, I will make you suffer!"

"I have nothing left because of you!"

"Oh yes you do, you're lucky she's still alive, maybe I should go pay her a visit at the hospital," I am so close to coming up to him and strangling him.

"LEAVE HER ALONE!" I scream, coming on top of him and punching him repeatedly, but he hits me off and throws me across the grass.

"Don't worry, I won't hurt her for now, but we will finish this later," he smirks pressing a button on his wrist and stepping onto his glider.

I web the glider once more and swipe it from under Goblin's feet.

He falls to the ground.

The rest of the fight is silent, I kick, he dodges, he punches, I dodge.

This goes on for about 30 minutes, and I am exhausted.

Finally I get Goblin on the ground, and web him to it.

I watch him in anger and pain, not so much literal pain, but the pain of loosing my loved ones, that hurts more than what any pumpkin bomb can do to me.

I turn to my right to see the Avengers arriving, and all of a sudden my invisible mask can no longer be seen through.

I exchange my pained expression for a happy one.

"Looks like you're going back to jail," I say in a jokey tone, fighting the urge to let my voice crack, I was at the verge of a breakdown.

The Avengers look from me to Goblin and then back at me.

"Well this was a waste of time," Tony says from under his iron suit.

"Well I'll let you take him away," I say trying to hide my now shaking body.

I shoot a web, blocking out their voices and swinging away, just before the tears fall from under my mask.

 _Putting Goblin behind bars changes nothing, Aunt May is still in the hospital and everyone else is still dead._

 _Every mention of my own name reminds me that Peter Parker has nothing left, Spider-man is the only one that has a reason to live, not much of a reason, but it is something._

 _I need to keep living to save the people of New York, even if they call me a criminal, a menace, a murderer._

I crash onto the roof I know so well, it may be of a building I don't know, but the roof I am familiar with.

I always sit here and enjoy the view.

I lay on the hard stone for what seems like hours, no longer having the strength to keep going.

I close my eyes in an attempt to get some sleep, even if it is on top of a roof.

The second my eyelids fall closed Gwen's face accompanied by her scream flashes in front of me, making me open my eyes afraid to see it again.

Tears fall from my face and suddenly I am gasping for air, it seems like my lungs have collapsed into each other.

I know what this is, a panic attack.

I sit up and try once more to fill my burning lungs, but I just end up coughing up blood.

I guess Goblin did hit me pretty hard a few times.

With the last of my strength I stumble towards the abandoned subway train, it is the only place I can stay.

When I am there, I lay down on the floor with my eyes open, not bothered enough to tend my wounds.

My thigh's bullet wound has reopened and is now bleeding again, along with too many other wounds.

I lift my hand to my lip, already feeling it throbbing from the Goblin's punches.

I sigh, this is going to be a long night.


	6. Chapter 6

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

I lay awake all night long and through a large part of the day.

I have no way to tell if it is morning except my clock, but I am too deep in thought to tilt my head right.

Only when it rings to tell my to go on patrol I realise it must be in the middle of the day.

I get up with a grunt of pain and, shoulders slumped, walk outside of the subway train, just before I take my soaked mask off and squeeze the wet tears away.

Once I am outside, no longer in my Spider-man suit, I walk to the graveyard, to pay a visit to my family.

I could also go to the hospital and visit Aunt May, but I let her down, I didn't save her when she needed me most, if I had just stayed home that day she would've been fine, it's all my fault, I can't face her, not yet anyway.

The graveyard is grim with not many people around, except for the hundreds upon hundreds of dead souls buried beneath the ground.

At the front gate is a guard I know well, "Hello Robby," I say giving him a sad smile.

"Hello Peter, coming to visit them again," he replies in a soft, sympathetic tone.

I nod, unable to form words at the moment.

He steps aside opening the gate so I can get through.

I walk through to an area with five graves all lined next to each other, first is my mum and dad, then Uncle Ben, next is Captain Stacy, and then Gwen.

A space of dirt is left next to Gwen, that's were I'll be buried one day.

"Hi everyone, Uncle Ben, I'm really sorry about Aunt May, it's all my fault, I should have been there and now I'm too ashamed to even visit her."

"And Gwen, I'm sorry I was too slow to catch you that night, I love you with everything I have and hate myself for letting you die."

"Captain Stacy, I'm sorry I broke your promise, I should have left Gwen alone like you said, then she would have never died, and I'm also sorry about your death, I created the lizard by giving Dr Conners that formula, it's my fault your dead, I'm sorry."

"Uncle Ben, I selfishly let that robber go, you were the only one who did the right thing that night, and it's not fair that you suffered because of it, I am fully responsible for you dying, and I am really sorry."

"Mum and dad, I don't know much about you, I would barely have remembered what you look like if I didn't have pictures of you both, you two are the only ones that I have nothing to do with your deaths, and the pain faded a long time ago, I am still learning more about your work though, and how you created the spiders, I guess I have you to blame for making me this way, but more myself, if I didn't sneak into Oscorp than none of this would have happened."

I sigh, "I'm sorry everyone, it's all my fault, I should go now, patrol and everything."

I turn and walk away from them with tear stained cheeks, I hate my life.

For months it's the same thing, wake up, visit the graves, go on patrol, sit and watch the sunset, then go back to the subway train.

I cannot say the exact time because I have no idea, each day is the same as the next.

It's painfully boring, and just painful considering that without any proper food and without any sleep at all, my heeling factor just won't do it's job.

One day after a painful patrol I find myself sitting the roof looking at the view thinking, once more of what would happen if I were to kill myself.

I thought about this often now and every time I do, I get a little closer to doing it.

 _I have nothing to loose._

 _If I jump I'll be reunited with my whole family and Gwen, oh how much I miss her touch, her beautiful laugh, her smile that makes me melt._

 _I feel weak and tired of living._

 _I just want to jump, to be free of the pain and no longer have to suffer._

My eyes start to water and it becomes hard to breath again.

I pull of my mask and gasp for fresh air.

Once my breathing has calmed I put my mask back on and swing around.

 _There are so many people living their lives without a care in the world whilst I have to go through so much pain._

 _I risk my life for these people everyday and they don't care, they fear me because of my power, because I made a few mistakes and was the cause of people's deaths._

My spider-sense warns me of the bullet that shoots through the air and snaps the web I am currently swinging on.

I flip in the air and shoot another web, looking towards were the bullet came from.

I spy a policeman and a few others in cars.

 _Not this again._

I swing away as fast as I can, zooming past buildings, the police turn their sirens on and follow me on the roads.

I yank on my web, making it bring me higher in the sky and do a quick twist making me take a sharp turn away from the cars.

Luckily my movement is too fast to follow and after I am sure I am free I land on the side of Stark Tower.

How I ended up on Stark Tower I have no idea.

 _The police hate me, just like everyone else._

 _What's the point, no one cares if I kill myself, everyone who ever cared is dead._

 _I can let go, just let myself fall, no longer have to deal with the pain._

 _I have nothing to loose, I'll finally be free, finally be free._

I let go of the building and start falling head first towards the ground, whispering "I'll finally be free" again and again, as I plummet to my death.g


	7. Chapter 7

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

My eyes are scrunched closed, as the wind swirls past me, "I'll finally be free," I say for the last time, before another thought enters my mind.

I shoot a web as quickly as I can, rethinking the whole suicide thing.

I am too close to the ground though and so my back scrapes the pavement, ripping off the back of my suit and tearing a large part of my skin off.

I yelp in pain and land on the nearest roof, Stark Tower's roof to be exact.

I fall face first and lay there for about ten minutes before I hear a door opening.

I jump to my feet and face Tony Stark, trying to hide my blood covered back.

"Come with me," he commands, he seems sort of upset, or disappointed?

 _Anyway he definitely doesn't seems in his usual jolly mood._

"I can't, I... uh... have family matters to attend to," I say only sort of lying, I was planning to visit the graves again.

"I'm serious, come with me or I'll make you," I sigh not wanting to start a fight, especially with my back like this, and follow him inside.

He leads me back to the room where I had lunch, sort of, with them last time.

All the Avengers look at me in shock.

"What?" I question, in my Spider-man happy mood.

"Take a seat," says Tony.

I do as he says and he also sits down before he brings up a video of me sticking on the side of his building a few minutes ago.

My stomach churns as I realise what it is about to show.

He presses play and the video shows me sitting their with a sad expression, before letting go and falling and falling, until at the last minute I shoot a web and scrape my back whilst letting out a pained yelp.

After the video finishes they all look at me.

"What was that?" asks Tony, the one who seems to be taking charge of the situation.

"I shot a web to late?" I say as more of a question than an answer.

"Why were you going to kill yourself?" asks Steve a little shaken up that someone he, sort of, knew would try to commit suicide.

"Why do you care?" I murmur making it unable for them to make out what I said.

"You're always so happy, why would you do it?" asks Clint joining in with the questioning.

"I just shot a web too late, too deep in thought, nothing special," I lie.

"Sure," says Natasha clearly not believing what I had just stated.

I don't say anything to that.

"You aren't leaving until we get some answers," says Tony.

I roll my eyes, "If that's how you want to do it."

I lean back in my chair, ignoring the pain from my back, "I have no where to go anyway."

"What about your 'family matters'?" Tony asks.

"That can wait," I reply.

"For how long?" asks Bruce.

"As long as it needs to."

"Jarvis, don't let Spider-man leave the building," Tony says still looking straight into my eyes.

"Of course, sir," comes a voice from the ceiling.

"You have an AI! I heard rumours but I didn't know if it was true!" I say smiling and trying to change the subject.

"Yeah," Tony says with a smile.

"Don't try and change the subject," says Natasha calmly, catching on to my plan.

"Sorry," I say raising my hands, "I just think it's cool."

She give me a look that says she doesn't believe me, why does she have to be a super spy?

"Why did you try to kill yourself?" asks Clint again.

"I didn't," I say confidently, it wasn't a lie, I didn't try to kill myself, I was going to do it, nothing was stopping me except myself.

"Yeah, because that's the reason you let yourself almost fall to your death," Tony says rolling his eyes.

"I wasn't paying attention," I say with a shrug.

"Ok then, take off your mask or tell us your name so we can find out about your personal life and, if we see no reason for you to want to kill yourself, then we'll let you go," says Tony explaining his plan.

"No," I reply.

"Hmm," says Tony not amused, "You'll be allowed on the Avengers floor and the rooms floor, your bedroom will have a Spider symbol on it, don't go in any other bedroom or you'll be in trouble."

"Now Bruce, take him to the medical to check if his back is ok," Bruce nods and stands up leading me to the door.

"You should take off your suit," Bruce says.

"Um no thanks," I reply.

"As you wish," Bruce shrugs, putting a wet cloth to my back to wipe away the blood.

"Mmm" I say biting my tongue from the pain so hard that I draw blood.

"Sorry, but it needs to be cleaned."

I nod my head and after a while he pulls away the cloth and looks at my cleaned wound.

"That's a pretty bad wound you got there."

"Yeah," I agree.

"Last time, I noticed you had a healing factor, it wasn't a strong one but it was there, what happened to it?" he questions curiously.

"Oh... uh... it stopped working," I state awkwardly.

"Why?"

"It was... because... it's complicated," I sigh.

He nods, "Are you ever going to take off your mask?"

"No," I shake my head at the though of it.

"Eventually Tony will find out who you are," Bruce says interrupting my thoughts.

"And until then it'll be a secret," I state.

He steps back taking another look at my back.

"I should bandage it, you lost a thick layer of skin."

"Yeah, ok," I say agreeing with his plan.

After a few minutes of painful bandaging it's finally done and I make my way to the floor with all the rooms on it.

I walk around the silent hallway until I come across a room with a large Spider-man logo on it.

 _When did Tony have the time to make this?_

I enter the room and look around, it has a neat white bed in the left corner of the room, and a dresser next to it.

There is also a door on the right wall and I open it to see a colour coded bathroom with blue tiles.

I don't bother to change into anything as there might be cameras around, and just lay down on the bed and close my eyes.

For a second I think about the Avengers and everything they've done for me, even if they don't know it, but soon memories of Gwen come into my mind and I see her falling down to the ground of the clock tower.

I open my eyes and stare at the ceiling again, staying like that all night long.


	8. Chapter 8

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

 _I'm at the clock tower, watching Gwen fall._

 _"No!" I scream, my voice bounces off the walls repeating itself again and again._

 _I watch the scene unfold once more._

 _My web attaches to her but its to late._

 _I hold her in my arms, tears streaming down my cheeks._

 _"Not again, not again," I whisper._

 _Suddenly a shaken voice comes from her lips, "Why didn't you save me, it's all your fault."_

 _I look towards her, more tears threatening to spill._

 _"I... I..." I can't argue, it is my fault, all my fault._

 _The scenery changes around me and soon I am back in my neighbourhood, staring at the ashes of my house._

 _Aunt May is in the stretcher, I run up to her, tears still spilling from before._

 _"Oh please no," I choke out between tears._

 _Seconds of silence fill the air, only silent sobs can be heard._

 _"Why didn't you save me, it's all your fault," her words are barely hearable, but I know what she says._

 _"I know, it's my fault," I say believing her words._

 _The world morphs around me leaving me on Oscorp's_ _roof staring at Captain Stacy's almost dead body._

 _"Why didn't you save me, it's all your fault," he whispers, a disappointed expression crosses his features._

 _I nod, not wanting to burst into more tears._

 _Then I find myself back on the street, hovering my hands over Uncle Ben's bullet wound._

 _"Not this again," I scrunch up my eyes not wanting to look into Uncle Ben's._

 _"Why didn't you save me, he was right in front of you, you let him kill me, it's all your fault."_

 _"I know, I know it's all my fault, everything is my fault, I hate my life!" I scream, my voice rising with each word._

I shoot up in my bed and look around.

My hand comes to my face feeling for my mask, luckily it still sits on my head covering my bloodshot red eyes.

 _I must of fallen asleep, haven't done that in a while._

I stand up from the bed shaking.

I have nothing to change into and I am too afraid that they have cameras installed in my room to take off my mask and take a shower, so I just walk out.

After a few minutes of wondering in the halls I finally find the lift.

"Jarvis, Avengers floor please," I say into thin air.

"Of course, sir," he replies.

A few minutes go by and I find myself coming out of the lift and stepping into a familiar room.

Clint and Natasha turn their heads towards me.

"What?" I question stepping inside, "Tony is the one who locked me up inside the tower, so stop being so surprised that I'm here."

They shrug and turn back to the television.

I walk to join them on the couch when I notice what their watching.

"Hey, can you change to something else?" I ask.

"What, you don't like the news?" Natasha wonders.

"Doesn't the news bother you? Don't you feel bad hearing about all the people you didn't save, just because you were to tired to stay up all night protecting the city?"

Natasha thinks about it for a minute, not answering my question, but she does change the channel.

"I guess it's just me then," I murmur quietly.

I stare at the television blankly, not really paying attention.

Suddenly Thor bursts through the door, "Where are the pop tarts?" he shouts.

"Don't you think you've had enough pop tarts for a while?" asks Clint.

"Where are they, eye of hawk!" he screams angrily.

Clint points to the cupboard afraid to argue further with the god of thunder.

I burst out laughing, "Thor likes his pop tarts a little to much?" I ask.

Clint nods vigorously, getting a dirty look from Thor.

I smile, The Avengers are a crazy bunch.

"Hey Spidey, wanna play a game?" asks Clint holding up a Nintendo controller.

A smirk creeps its way onto my face to match Clint's grin.

"I've been playing since I was 5," I laugh.

"Hmm let's test your skill then," he says tossing the controller at me.

I catch it without moving my gaze away from Clint.

He presses a button and Mario Cart comes onto the screen.

"I don't know why I'm here," Natasha says leaving the room.

"That's not possible! You cheated somehow!" Clint says standing up from the sofa.

"You just won't admit defeat," I smirk.

"16 - 0, that's not possible, I rule at Mario Cart!" Clint argues.

"Sorry Clint, but not today," I say.

"I just... what... how?" he stutters.

"Wanna play a different game?" I ask.

"Definitely!"

I grab the controller and look through the available options, before coming to one I like.

"What's that?" he asks.

"You haven't played this?" he shakes his head, "It's like the Olympic Games, you have to actually run and jump in front of the television, you don't use the controllers."

"Do they have archery?" he wonders.

"No, but they do have javelin," I smile.

"Fine, it'll have to do," he says sadly.

A few hours later.

Steve and Tony walk into the room just as I win another round of volleyball.

"Spike!" I yell.

"You're beating Katniss in volleyball?" asks Tony, clearly amused.

"Katniss? But yeah," I smile.

"What do you want for dinner?" Steve asks no one in particular.

"Wait, Captain America cooks?" I ask.

"Yup," Clint says.

"How about... spaghetti?" Tony asks.

Steve nods and starts right away on cooking.

"I'm not hungry, I'll be in my room," I say, turning to leave.

"But you haven't eaten anything all day," Steve states a little concerned.

"It's fine, not a big deal," I say giving them a fake smile and walking out the door.

They are going to notice something is wrong.

I sigh walking into my room and grabbing my web shooters, jabbing a pencil I found into it to change a few things for the better.

I spend all night tinkering with them and sketching improvements for my suit.


	9. Chapter 9

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

The sun peaks through my window, informing me of another day.

I force myself off of my chair and to the door, I open it to find a note on the outside.

'Dear Spider-man

Me and the rest of the Avengers are out on a mission for a week. You can help yourself to anything you find in the cupboards or fridge. I suggest to stay away from the pop tarts though, learned that the hard way.

Sincerely Bruce Banner'

I smile at how formally he wrote it on a neon pink sticky note.

Deciding to explore my room, I close the door again and run my hand on the surface of the dresser.

The wood is nicely sanded, leaving no chance of having a splinter embedded into my skin.

I follow the swirls of the wood in a sort of dance, admiring the beauty of the simplest of things.

After tracing the wood to the end of the dresser I reach my hand out to grab the first drawer.

It opens to reveal a stack of neatly piled paper and a few pencils, along with some basic equipment, a: rubber, sharpener and ruler.

I close it, remembering of discovering this particular drawer yesterday.

The second drawer is what I open next, it has a computer placed inside.

I do not recognise the brand, as I do not see a brand at all.

 _Tony must have made it._

 _I knew a lot about him and the most important things he invented as he was one of my childhood heroes, but I never bothered to find out about the simple things he created._

Taking it out, I bring it to the bed and sit down before placing it on my lap.

I open it to see it hasn't been used yet, and still needs a password.

An idea makes its way into my mind and I find myself punching in codes to hack Jarvis.

It takes time since Tony had spent ages improving Jarvis to make it almost impossible to hack, but I can work with almost impossible.

Seconds later I am looking through the building's map, trying to find something interesting to do.

I stop on a floor devoted to a gym, with all the workout equipment I could ever imagine.

I smile creeps its way onto my face as I figure out what I will be doing with my time at the tower.

Hacking further into Jarvis I give myself the freedom to leave and access the entire tower.

I notice a section where it says something about cameras.

It brings me to footage of all sorts of places, then I find one of this room.

I frown and change the footage, looping it so it seems as if I spend the whole day on this laptop.

I do the same to the gym, so it seems like I was never there.

Then, excitedly, I run into the hallway and jump into the lift, "The floor with the gym please Jarvis."

"Yes, sir," he replies, reminding me of the amazing work I did hacking him.

The elevator beeps, informing me of its stop.

The room I walk into is identical to the map on the laptop.

There are: running machines, weights, punching bags, and so much more.

Slowly walking into the space, I breath in the sent of old sweat.

I make my way to the weights, taking one I think should do me some good, only to find out I can lift it with a single finger.

After a few minutes of pondering about what to lift, I come to a conclusion, to lift the whole rack of weights.

Since there is only one rack, I have to lift it with my right arm first then swap to my left arm, it isn't as officiant, but still worth my time.

Each time I lift it up it is harder than the one before and with all the silence my thoughts can't help but drift.

My thoughts are my worst enemy.

 _Why don't I leave?_

 _I can open the doors and walk out, none of the Avengers are here to stop me._

 _But is that what I want?_

 _Do I want to walk away from the only other people I know, the people that I feel I may be able to have a friendship with?_

 _Why did I have to kill Uncle Ben, Captain Stacy and Gwen?_

 _Why did I have to let Harry turn into the Goblin and ruin the rest of my life?_

 _No, it's not Harry's fault, it's mine, all mine, I ruined my life, I killed everyone I loved by not saving them, I'm the murderer._

With one more lift I send that rack flying into the wall.

Still angry at myself, I walk over to the punching bag and hit it as hard as I can.

It swings from the wall but seems sturdy enough to take on my strength.

I punch again, feeling a shot of pain in my hand, but I keep going, not caring about pain or anything at that moment.

 _Why didn't I save them?_

 _Why didn't I try harder?_

 _Why didn't I save the last person I had left?_

 _After all I went through, all the mistakes I made, you'd think I would have learnt something, but I didn't, I didn't save the one person that needed saving the most._

I punch the punching bag again and again, harder than before, and it finally flies off it's hinges and across the room.

That's when I become aware of my bloody hands, that I punched so hard that my skin has come off.

The blood drips down my arms and onto the floor.

I slump down against the wall and end up sitting on the floor.

I take a sharp breath to fill my lungs with air.

My breathing is harsh and I can feel sweat trickling down my forehead, but I fight to keep tears from falling from my glassy eyes.

After a few minutes of calming down, I lift my hands to my eyes to take a closer look at the damage.

The skin has peeled off and the bones of my knuckles are showing.

As expected it hurts so much.

I stand from the floor and walk to the lift deciding to clean the gym another time.

The lift brings me back to the floor with my room, I walk to my room and for the first time at Stark Tower, I take off my Spider-man suit and take a nice cold shower.

The water runs down my body and washes away the dried blood on my hands.

After the shower I wrap a towel around my waist and grab my suit.

I walk to the bed and sit down with a needle and some thread, trying to use it to sew up the tears.

My injured hands makes it impossibly to do anything, but I try anyway.

I let my head rest on the pillow and I stare at the ceiling for the rest of the night, avoiding any nightmares.


	10. Chapter 10

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

I look around the room I'm too tired to keep staring at the ceiling, and force myself to my feet, flinching when my hand touches the bed.

 _I need to get bandages._

Once I find a medical kit in another drawer, I use it to wrap up my hands tightly, ignoring the pain once more.

 _It will heal in a week or so._

I then walk up to my Spider-man suit, wondering what to do today.

 _I could leave the tower and never come back, or I could stay here as told to._

 _Or, maybe, I could go out for one day, not in my Spider-man suit, and see how the city is holding up without me._

 _If they desperately need me, I'll come back as their friendly neighbourhood Spider-man, if not, I'll stay at the tower._

I smile slightly after deciding what to do and walk towards the window, only to find out I am wearing just a towel and have no clothes other than my Spider-man suit.

So I take the suit and put it on, stealthily going out of my window unseen.

I sneak from the tower all the way down to the abandoned subway, where I have been living before the Avengers found me.

I change into civilian clothes and pack some more clothes, along with a bit of tech, in a backpack that I can carry around with me.

Pulling my hood over my head, I walk onto the sidewalk and blend into the crowed.

I listen to the sound of people talking.

Having super hearing makes everything a little more interesting.

I can tune into conversation miles away, or just listen to it all at once.

Noticing a stand full of newspapers I take one and read the headline.

'Spider-man hasn't been seen for days, has the masked murderer finally given up?'

I frown when I see the murderer part, but shake my head, trying to get rid of my thoughts.

 _I am a murderer._

 _I killed so many people._

 _Stop, I can't think about this now._

I carry on walking down the sidewalk and end up overhearing a conversation, with my hearing who wouldn't?

"What do you think happened to Spider-man?" a female voice asks.

"He probably finally realised no one likes him, and that he is a no good murderer," another replies.

"You really think he killed those people?" the first asks.

"Of course, the only question could be if it was on purpose."

"You're right, if he stayed as Spider-man he would only kill more people."

I block out their voices, not wanting the tears that have formed in my eyes to spill.

 _The public hates me._

I keep walking, pushing past the people when I hear a familiar voice.

"Hey!" he says stopping my from going further because of me bumping into him.

"Sorry," I murmur.

"Peter Parker is that you?" he asks spinning my around.

I lift my face up to look up at him and muster a fake smile, "Hi Flash."

"Wow you look terrible," he states noticing the huge bags under my eyes and the few scars littered across my face from my days fighting crime.

"Yeah," I say quietly, looking back down at the floor.

"What do you do now anyway?" he asks.

"Nothing," I reply.

"Oh so you're unemployed," I nod, "Where do you live? Still in Queens?"

"Uh, it's complicated."

"Are you at a college?" he asks, continuing with the questions.

"No," I answer truthfully.

"Really? You're so smart I always thought you'd go to some super good college."

"I'm too busy to go to college."

"Doing what?" he says asking the question I was hoping he wouldn't ask.

"I... uh... it's complicated," I reply, stuttering with what to say.

"Everything seems to be complicated for you," he laughs.

"It is," I sigh.

"You can work as an intern at Oscorp like me," he says, "If you're interested that is of course, I'm sure they'd be happy to have you working there."

I give him a weak smile, "I'll think about it."

He nods, "You can just show up whenever you want and apply for it, they'll know who you are," he smiles at the last part.

"How?" I ask genuinely confused.

"I've mentioned you and how smart you are once or twice," he smiles cheekily.

I give him a quizzical look, but he just laughs again and waves, "See you soon Parker."

"Yeah," I reply still confused by Flash's kindness.

 _He bullied me for so many years, did he really change?_

 _I don't know what to think._

I shake my head, getting rid of the thoughts and walk into a corner shop.

A man is reaching his hand into the cash register and taking out money, stuffing a bag full of it.

He clearly doesn't work here and he doesn't seem friendly.

I notice muffled shouts coming from the closet, so soft no normal being would be able to hear it.

The man turns around and sees me standing at the door.

"What are you looking at?!" he shouts, "If you keep your mouth shut you'll leave here alive."

I shake my head.

 _Even when I am not Spider-man trouble always comes my way._

I walk towards him and give him a look that says 'let's get this over with.'

He lets out a small chuckle and throws a punch in my direction.

I dodge effortlessly and with grace, swiping my feet under his, sending him falling to the floor.

He grunts and tries to get up, but before he can I punch him unconscious.

I walk towards the closet and open it to see a teenage boy, a little older than me, with a terrified expression on his features.

I untie the ropes holding him from movement and take the sock out of his mouth.

"You ok?" I ask.

He nods, still shaken by everything, and I reach my hand out to help him off the floor.

We step out of the closet and he looks surprised to see a nerd had somehow beaten up a criminal.

"How...?" he speaks his thoughts out loud.

I shrug and he looks me up and down before thanking me and sending me off with a handful of chocolate cookies.

The teenager, Billy as he introduced himself as, said I could have them as a thank you.

I decided to go back to Stark Tower because it was starting to get dark.

After crawling on the side of the building unnoticed, I throw my bag across the room and jump on top of my bed, attempting at closing my eyes before a flash of images cross my vision, leaving me with me eyes open laying awake.


	11. Chapter 11

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

After hours of staring at nothing in particular, I climb out of the bed and sit myself on the edge.

I reach out and grab my Spider-man suit out of my backpack then grab a needle and thread and start sewing up my suit again.

This time my hands have healed, a bit, and I manage to make the suit as good as new.

I grab the bag then walk through the hall and once again ride the lift down to the gym.

It still has equipment scattered around and I know I'll have to clean it up at some point, but for now I'll just carry on working out.

"Sir," Jarvis says interrupting me punching another punching bag with my already injured hands, trying not to scream out in pain.

"The Avengers are on their way back to the tower because their mission finished early, they will arrive in approximately 10 minutes," the AI informs me.

 _How will I clean everything up in 10 minutes?_

"Oh, uh, thanks Jarvis."

"Of course, sir."

Next thing I know I am running around the room cleaning up the gym.

 _I can't let them know that I hacked into Jarvis._

I check my watch concerned I was too late.

 _1 more minute._

Whilst hopping on one foot in an attempt to change into my spandex suit, I make my way to the lift.

"Jarvis, the floor with my room on it and quickly please," I state covering my face with my mask.

"Yes, sir," I impatiently tap my foot on the lift floor.

"The Avengers have arrived and are asking for you to meet them on the Avengers floor," Jarvis informs me.

 _Ok, just quickly go to my room first, drop off my backpack there and then go to the Avengers floor, simple enough._

"Ok Jarvis, please still bring me to the floor with my room on it."

"Yes, sir."

I run to my room and throw my bag into an empty drawer, then stop to look at myself in the mirror checking that I put my suit on correctly.

I did.

I then casually walk down the hall and into the lift again.

Without having to tell Jarvis, it brings me to the Avengers floor.

I walk in to see Clint laying face first on the couch taking up all the space, Tony sitting with his legs up on the coffee table in an armchair and Bruce sitting at the kitchen counter with Steve and Natasha.

"Hey," I wave awkwardly, "Jarvis said you wanted me to come."

"Yes," Bruce starts, "We were wondering how everything went when we were gone?"

"Oh, just fine, I stayed in my room most of the time," I lie.

"You hungry?" Steve asks opening some of the cupboards, "I can make some sandwiches?"

 _I can't keep saying no to food, they're going to get suspicious._

"Sounds good," I say after a moments hesitation.

Steve nods whilst starting to make sandwiches and putting them on plates for all of the Avengers and I.

I stare at the sandwich for a moment and Tony must have noticed.

"It's not poisoned," he states with a smirk.

I role my eyes, although they cannot see it through my mask.

"Ha ha," I say sarcastically.

I then pull my mask over my nose so I can eat and take a small bite of the sandwich.

Natasha seems to be looking at the part of my skin you can see, observing it along with the few visible scars.

She could possibly even be making guesses of who's behind the mask.

I take another few bites of the sandwich, absorbing the taste that I missed so much, before I put it down and excuse myself from the table, saying I'll be in my room.

In reality I get Jarvis to take me to the gym, hoping that no one would go there anytime soon.

I had just remembered that I left my web shooters in the corner of the room.

I walk out of the lift into the gym and quickly make my way to the corner and bring my web shooters to my wrists.

Then I speed walk towards the lift and press the button.

It opens with Steve inside.

His eyes go wide at seeing me and I wave awkwardly.

"Didn't you say you would be in your room?" I nod sheepishly.

"And didn't Tony only allow you on two floors?" again I nod.

"And this floor wasn't one of them?" once more I nod.

"How?" he wonders.

"Well, I, um, maybe, sort of, hacked into Jarvis to give me access to all the floors," I reply.

His eyes go wide again.

"You can do that?" he asks shocked.

"Well I like to consider myself smart enough, yes."

"Ok," he says going through the information in his head.

"Please don't tell Tony, I just needed something to do and..."

"I won't tell him," Steve interrupts.

I breath a sigh of relief.

"Wait, but if you can hack Jarvis doesn't that mean you can also leave the tower?" he asks.

"Oh, um, well, yes, yes I can," I say, my voice becoming quieter and quieter by each word.

"Then why don't you?"

"I don't know, I guess I don't mind staying at the tower," I murmur.

"I see," he says with a frown.

"Can I ask you something?" I say with a new found confidence.

"Of course," he replies.

"Why didn't you arrest me?" he frowns when I ask.

"Why would I?" he wonders.

"Because I'm a murderer," I reply looking at the floor.

"You really believe that?" he asks concerned.

"Never mind," I mumble stepping into the lift.

"Goodbye," Steve waves and heads for the punching bags as the lift doors close.

"Jarvis, please take me to my room, and don't stop on any other floor."

"Yes sir," the AI replies.

I sigh.

 _I'm such an idiot._

 _I should have just left when I could, now Steve knows I can access all the floors and leave if I want to._

I step out of the lift and walk to my room, that's were I sit on my bed and take off my web shooters, fiddling with it for a few hours.


	12. Chapter 12

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

After what seemed like hours I find myself studying Jarvis.

Each piece of coding is so complicated yet simple I find myself awestruck, but that is when I notice the date in the corner of the computer screen.

 _Already?_

 _How long was I living in the subway train?_

"Jarvis, tell the Avengers to come here for a meeting," my enhanced hears pick up Tony from a few floors up.

 _A meeting huh?_

 _I wonder if it's about me._

 _I'll just listen from here._

10 minutes pass by before I hear the voices again.

"So Stark, what is it this time?" Clint asks.

"There is a crazy guy in a metal bird suit calling himself the Vulture terrorising civilians," Tony replies with a sigh, as if he is disappointed that his life has come to this.

 _Wait, a person in an animal themed metal suit?_

Panic flows through my spine in a shiver as I connect the dots.

Next thing I know I find myself running through the hall and into the lift.

"He's going to break Harry out of prison!" I shout as I come running into the room.

All the Avengers freeze and look at me confused at my presence as I sit on an empty chair panting.

"What is the Man of Spiders talking about?" Thor asks.

"I heard you talking from my room and..." before I can finish Clint interrupts.

"Wait you can hear us from your room?!" he asks in shock.

"Yeah yeah, enhanced hearing, but that's not the point. You said it was a man in an animal themed metal suit, in this case a bird," I look at Tony and see him nod in an interested manner.

"Just like Rhino and Doc Ock, who both escaped at the same time as Harry did," most of them give me blank stares, except Natasha.

"They're all working together," she explains before I can.

"Exactly! And so Vulture is going to break Harry out of Ravenscroft Prison!" I exclaim.

Thor nods before rising from his seat, "Avengers Assemble!" he shouts.

Everyone stands and goes out to grab their equipment, "I'm coming too," I state with confidence.

Tony turns to look at me, unsure if it is a good idea, "What if you try to run away?"

I lay my eyes on Steve's and give him a pleading look, he knows I won't leave otherwise I would have already done it.

"I think it will be ok," Steve says turning to the group.

"But..." Tony tries but I interrupt.

"These are my villains, I know how to handle them," I say confidently.

"But you've never met Vulture," Tony argues.

"But I've met his tech, along with the person who created it," I state crossing my arms over my chest.

"But..."

"This is between Harry and I, I'm not going to let you fight my battle for me."

"I know you've fought Goblin before but that doesn't mean it is just between you and him."

"This is personal," I sigh, everyone in the room is watching me and Tony argue, "Besides, it doesn't matter if you fight him, Harry is always going to come after me."

"Why?" Tony asks.

"It's complicated," I reply.

Tony sighs but nods in defeat, "Let's go."

We walk across the top of Stark Tower and into the quinjet.

The Avengers all sit in a seat designed for them, whilst I climb up a wall and sit cross legged on the ceiling.

"It comfy up there?" Clint asks amused.

"You'd be surprised," I reply.

Clint chuckles along with a few others.

A few minutes go by before we land at Ravenscroft Prison and my assumptions are proven correct as Vulture is fighting some guards to get inside, along with Rhino and Doc Ock.

"Don't let them get inside, Iron Man and I on Rhino, Widow and Hawkeye on Doc Ock and Spider-man on Vulture, Bruce and Thor I don't think we'll need you at the moment but I'll give you a call if we do." Steve instructs.

I nod and run out of the quinjet, then shoot a web to the building and land on the roof of Ravenscroft.

"Hey Birdie, over here!" I say waving my hands to get his attention.

Vulture stops and looks at me before flying in the air and landing in front of me with a snarl.

"I know you've come here to break Harry out, let me guess. He's paying you and giving you a special Oscorp suit in exchange of you helping him destroy me? Right? I got it right, right?" I babble as Vulture starts throwing me punches.

He kicks me in the stomach and I double over before throwing myself over him and grabbing his wings, webbing them together.

However, it doesn't last long as the wings snap the web in a matter of seconds.

I sigh, "That never works, why do I even try?"

He throws an Oscorp bomb in my direction and I shoot a web towards it and swing it back into his face.

Vulture uses his metal wing to shield his exposed face and the bomb explodes doing little to no damage.

"Why are you so quiet? I just want to talk!"

He growls and grabs two more bombs chucking them at me.

I quickly web them to me and throw them as high as I can in the air.

They explode doing no damage to the air, but whilst I'm not looking Vulture leaps off of the roof and throws a bomb towards a wall.

The wall collapses to reveal Harry sitting on a chair.

He turns to see the destroyed wall and a smirk creeps its way onto his face as he stands up and walks outside, taking a deep breath of, sort of, fresh air.

"Uh, guys Harry kind of got out!" I shout.

Harry looks at me and his smile grows wider along with his eyes having an insane look.

His glider and armour come from behind Ravenscroft and return to their owner, Harry.

"I'm baaaack," Harry says in a sinister singsong voice stretching the 'a'.


	13. Chapter 13

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

Harry's grin brings back too many memories, painful memories.

His smile falters slightly when the Avengers decide to speak.

"Take Goblin out," Steve instructs.

"You can't just take Harry out, I know him, he has a plan and even if we take him out, his plan is still in action, and without knowing what it is we can't stop it," I reply, refusing to call Harry by the name Goblin.

"Well what do we do then?" Tony asks annoyed at not having an opportunity to fight yet.

"You do nothing, you're not meant to be here," Harry says with a snarl.

"Yeah, well too bad," Clint smiles.

"Ok Thor, now would be a good time to engage, Bruce stay there though, I don't think Hulk would be very helpful in his situation," Steve says speaking into the com.

"Don't let them touch me," Harry says looking at Rhino, Doc Ock and Vulture, "But leave Spider-man, he's mine."

"You don't have to do this, you already took everything away," I protest trying to knock some sense into him.

"Oh but you know fully well that I haven't," his smile widens, "It must have been a real shock for her to wake up from a coma in an old warehouse, luckily she won't have to live much longer with the memory."

"Don't you dare hurt her Harry!" I clench my fists in anger.

"What is he talking about Spider-man?" Steve asks concerned.

"I told you this is personal," I reply fists still clenched by my side.

"You can come find her, she's nearby it won't be too hard, just do it before it's too late," he laughs wickedly before his glider zooms into the air and away.

I step forward ready to shoot a web and go after him, but a hand on my shoulder stops me from leaving.

"You're playing right into his trap," Steve tries to inform me.

I nod, "I know, but if I don't she'll die."

"Who is she? Maybe we can help," Tony says stepping by my side after making Rhino run into a wall.

"It doesn't matter who she is, what matters is that she's safe, which she isn't, I have to go."

I jump and shoot a web towards the direction where Harry went.

 _He said she woke up in a warehouse, and that it wasn't too far away, so look for the nearest warehouse._

After a minute or so of swinging aimlessly around the city I find an abandoned warehouse.

 _That must be it!_

I land on the dirt and look up at where I am.

Before me stands a dark gloomy structure.

Ivy snakes around its mossy grey bricks and the few windows the building has are shattered, glass littering the floor surrounding them.

I take a deep breath before marching to the double doors at the front of the building, desperately trying to seem as if this situation has yet to faze me.

The doors are long and rust creeps against the corners of the old metal.

I easily push them open and step inside

I know it would be better to sneak inside and see if I can get her out of there without her getting hurt, but I can't seem to think straight at the moment.

All I see is a void of darkness with rare slivers of light from the windows and cracks within the bricks.

Harry, with an evil smile plastered on his face, steps out of the shadows dragging a chair with a fragile old woman strapped to it.

He turns the chair to face me and reveals a woman with naturally brown hair pulled into a pony tail, showing the many streaks of silver among the brown.

Her expression is a sad one laced with confusion.

 _Aunt May._

"Let her go, Harry," I cry out.

Aunt May turns to look at me, more confusion is spread across her face.

"Spider-man?" her voice wavers and I can't help but feel my heart break seeing her like that.

"It's going to be ok ma'am," I reply as confidently as I can.

"Really, you really believe that?" Harry interrupts.

"Just let her go, she has nothing to do with this," I say.

"But you know very well Peter, that the best way to hurt you, is to hurt the ones you love," a sickening laugh vibrates through the air and a shiver runs down my spine.

"Oh gosh... Peter?" Aunt May asks.

"Yes," I whisper staring at my feet.

"I... how... why?"

"If I can do good things, I have the moral obligation to do those things, with great power comes great responsibility Aunt May," I reply.

"Your uncle was a wise man," she replies, tears pooling in her eyes.

"I know," I sigh.

"This is beautiful, but Mrs Parker, have you stopped and wondered if the rumours are true?" Harry cuts into the conversation uninvited.

"What rumours," Aunt May asks, but I can hear her voice waver and know she knows what Harry is talking about.

"You haven't heard? Oh, that's a shame," Harry stops for dramatic affect, "Spider-man doesn't have the best reputation among the people."

"Most rumours are nothing but rumours, it's always the most untold stories that hold the truth," my aunt interrupts, hoping to put a stop to Harry's endless word games.

A chuckle fills the mostly silent night, but it's not a genuine chuckle, it's a chuckle that makes your stomach do flips from fear.

"Don't try and deny it Mrs Parker, your Peter was there the night your husband died, he came face to face with the murderer, yet he did nothing to stop him, and so the criminal left and killed your husband."

"Peter was fighting the Lizard when Captain Stacy died, he died trying to help Peter defeat the Lizard, but Peter wasn't there fast enough to stop the Lizard from killing Captain Stacy and so the rumours began."

"Then came me and..." Harry tried to start the story about Gwen when the Avengers came crashing through the door, minus Bruce of course who was just listening through the coms.


	14. Chapter 14

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

Harry watches in disgust at the new arrivals, but he seems to think about it for a moment before hovering in the air and pressing a button on his suit.

I feel a slight tingle at in the back of my head and time slows down.

"Jump!" I shout as I leap into the air and shoot a web at the ceiling whilst I shoot a web at Aunt May's chair and pull her up, attaching her web to the ceiling so I don't have to hold it.

I watch her dangle in the air for what seems like a second but is about a millisecond before I divert my attention back to the Avengers.

Time goes back to normal as I watch them, but it's to late though as none of them react in time.

Electricity flows through the ground in what I imagine thousands of volts, as each Avenger cries out in pain before collapsing to the floor.

Mechanical arms like Doc Ock's come out of the wall and tie each Avenger up.

I try to stop one of the arms but it decides to attack me because of it.

It tries to stab me, but I climb further up my web and flip in the air, letting go of my web so I land with a crash on the arm on the floor.

"Oh Peter, now you got your friends in trouble too," Harry smiles wickedly.

The Avengers react at the name 'Peter', some showing confused faces, others realisation.

Harry notices and pulls a fake shocked face, "You didn't tell them who you are," his shocked expression is exchanged for an evil one, "We can have some fun with that."

"Take his mask off," Harry instructs to someone behind me.

I turn around, only to drop to to the floor out of the way of Vulture.

I push off the floor on my hands and wrap my legs around Vulture's neck, twisting so I bring him to the floor effectively and land on my feet.

Looking towards the Avengers again, I notice Rhino and Doc Ock are now guarding them so they don't escape.

I'm too busy looking to notice Vulture behind me and he reaches for my mask.

I flip forward, but Vulture already has a hand on my mask, so it comes off my head when I do it, however I do kick Vulture by flipping and send him across the floor.

I land on the floor in my signature pose staring down.

Deciding to just get it over with, I look up and face the Avengers.

Their expressions are mostly shocked and sad, and I know why.

I look like a child compared to them, a teenager with scars on his face, but the worst thing is everything all together.

I know what my face looks like, it shows that I've been through so much, gone through so much pain, and experienced things no teenager, more like no human, should.

No matter what, I can't hide it, I can't just hide my face, I tried, but it didn't last long, not long enough.

"How old are you?" Tony asks sternly, I just stand up and turn around to face Harry.

"Much younger than any of you," Harry replies for me, "Now Parker, let my just get your sweet Aunt May down from there," Harry emphasises 'Parker'.

Aunt May looks scared at that and I understand why.

"I promise you Harry, if you so much as hurt my aunt, or any of them, you will regret it," I wave my hand and gesture to the people I'm talking about.

"Oh Petey, why do you always make promises you don't intend on keeping."

I sigh, "Just stop talking Harry, how do you even know about that, you weren't even there."

"If I'm going to dedicate my life to making your life horrible, I have to do my research," he smirks wickedly at me.

"I don't understand Peter," Aunt May's frail voice calls from the ceiling.

"I know Aunt May, neither does everyone except Harry and I," I call back to her.

"Your life was perfect once wasn't it Peter? How old were you when it started crumbling down?" Harry mocks.

"Why are you doing this Harry?" I ask, not playing into his games.

"Because you betrayed me, I was dying, dying and you did nothing to help. I just needed your blood but you refused," he says spitting with rage.

"I didn't know what my blood would do to you, and I was right not to give it to you as it would only have turned you into the same thing the venom turned you into."

"And what is that?" he asks angrily.

"A monster, a murder, The Green Goblin."

"Who have I killed Peter, I am no murderer."

"Maybe so far its only one person, but you killed Gwen."

I can hear the Avengers whispering about who she is behind me.

"Gwen Stacy? The old police chief's daughter?" I hear Clint wonder.

"I think it's the Gwen that people are saying Spider-man killed," Tony replies.

"That is Gwen Stacy," interrupts Natasha.

"Oh Peter, you're still hung up on that? Huh, I just figured you and her simply liked each other, but now it seems like love," Harry babbles.

"Of course it was love... is love, and you knew that when you killed her Harry, don't lie to yourself," I raise my voice slightly, he is starting to make me angry.

"I may have killed her, but who decided to let her be there," Harry mocks, "First you broke your promise with Captain Stacy. He was dying on the roof of Oscorp because of the Lizard, and who created the Lizard? Oh yeah it was you. He was dying because of you and he used his dying words to make you promise to 'leave Gwen out of it' you didn't listen. You broke your promise and started seeing her again. Then when you were fighting Electro, you let her come and help you overcharge him, but when I showed up, every reason why Captain Stacy made you promise came true. She died just like you will die, saving the city."

"But don't forget that that is not all the deaths in your life, when you were only six years old your parents left. Why did they leave? They left to destroy their research on genetically enhanced spiders because of Oscorp trying to use it to make super soldiers. Your father destroyed as much research as he could and then added his DNA in the spider's venom so it wouldn't bond with any other humans'. But then of course you have some of your fathers DNA and so the spider venom bonded with your DNA and then Spider-man was born," Harry smiles as his story continues.

"Whatever the reason, your parents left and apparently died in a plane crash. It is true that they died in a plane, just not the actual crash. Oscorp sent a person to kill your parents and retrieve your father's research. He managed to kill your parents, the research however was already destroyed. But the point is, they died because of my company, Oscorp, trying to protect you."

"And then your Uncle, that happened just after you were bit by the spider and received your powers. You had an argument with him and left storming out of the house and onto the street. You walked to a corner shop and tried to buy milk or something, but you were what, two cents short? Something like that. Then a guy there decided to rob the store and gave you the milk before running out, you could have stopped him, but you didn't. You regretted that decision as that same man shot your uncle after your Uncle Ben tried to stop him. He died there in your arms, and you repeat his wise words everyday now, it's what gives you the courage to be Spider-man. 'With great power comes great responsibility' he would say, 'If you have the power to do good things, then you have the moral obligation to do those things'," Harry says, venom seeping into his words.

"Shut up Harry!" I shout running towards him and grabbing his glider from under his feat.

He falls to the floor with a grin on his face, "Did I make you angry?"

I stand for a second before attacking him, throwing punches and kicks with blind rage.

He dodges a few of the attacks but with my super speed reflexes it makes it difficult.

After a few minutes he kicks me so hard in the ribs that I go flying across the warehouse and crash into the wall.

I trace my hand across my ribs, noticing some are broken and one seems to be pressing lightly against my lung.

It hurts terribly but it doesn't matter, I deserve the pain.

Harry walks towards me and lifts me off the floor by my wrist squeezing it so the web shooter breaks and he snaps most of the bones in his grip.

I face him, looking at his busted lip and bruised face, smiling slightly at my small achievements.

"You know you look much worse," he says noticing my slight grin.

"That doesn't matter as long as you don't look so good either," I reply.

Harry grins evilly, "So heroic," he laughs dropping me to the floor again.

He then turns towards Rhino, Doc Ock and Vulture, "I'm bringing the place down."

They nod and leave their places besides the Avengers and against the wall.

"Bye bye," he says innocently before leaving along with the others.

I put my hand on the wall and lift myself up trying to stand on my own to legs, only to discover my right leg broken in a number of places because of the impact against the wall.

I groan as I put most of my weight on my left leg and scale the wall of the warehouse as quickly as I can.

"You must help us escape these octopus arms, Child of Spiders," Thor states making the rest of the Avengers nod in agreement.

"After I free the civilian," I sigh, clearly talking about my aunt.

After I reach the ceiling I grab onto the web and lower Aunt May to the floor.

Dropping down after I touch her down I yelp in pain of landing on my broken right leg, but I know that I had to do it otherwise I would have wasted precious time.

My spider-sense starts tingling softly in my head and I quickly free Aunt May and push her towards the door.

"Run, get out of here and keep going, get to the abandoned D-line and," I fish for an extra subway coin in my pocket, "Put this in the machine, stay in the subway train until I come get you, ok?"

Aunt May nods in reply and runs out of the warehouse, stopping by the front door and turning around for a second, "Stay safe Peter," she says before disappearing out of view.

My spider-sense grows rapidly and I start limping as fast as I can towards the Avengers, but I'm too late.

Bombs go off and I watch in horror as the ceiling starts falling.


	15. Chapter 15

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

Time slows down and I shift my gaze to the Avengers.

Natasha is using a knife to cut through the tentacles and Tony is doing the same with a laser.

The rest of the Avengers are talking frantically with Bruce over the comms.

 _They'll never have time to escape, the ceiling is coming down too fast._

 _I can run and try to leave, but then the Avengers will die._

 _I can't let any more people die because of me._

I watch the ceiling fall for a second and limp

quickly closer to the Avengers.

They watch me in confusion but make no attempt to ask what my plan is.

I lift my hands into the air and stand ready for impact.

 _I have to try and catch it._

 _The impact will crush the Avengers and I might be able to slow it down._

 _However the weight will probably crush them even without any impact but they will have more of a chance for survival._

I take a deep breath.

 _So I'm really doing it aren't I?_

 _I'm going to give my life to save others._

 _I always knew this day would come._

 _Might as well start my mini monologue._

 _I'm sorry Aunt May, for not saving Uncle Ben, when I easily could have, and now leaving you too, I hope you will be able to forgive me, but I understand if you can't._

 _I'm sorry Avengers, for being such an idiot and killing myself for you now, you were so nice to me when everyone considered me a murderer, I'll never forget that._

 _I'm sorry Gwen, for not saving you that night, I know you would have wanted me to move on and live a life again but it's just so hard, I love you._

 _I'm sorry Captain Stacy, for not saving you and breaking your dying wish which caused your daughter to die as well._

 _I'm sorry Uncle Ben, for not saving you when I clearly could have, you were the fatherly figure in my life and I hope you are proud of what I have become._

 _I'm sorry mum and dad, I don't remember much about you, but I know you were amazing people and I'm sorry if I am the reason you left, which caused your death._

 _I am even sorry Harry, for making you so mad that you wanted to swap to a criminal life._

 _I'm sorry everyone._

The ceiling is coming closer and I shift my weight to my left leg, hoping not to irritate my right leg as much.

I also move my right arm up slightly trying to take most of the impact.

Then the ceiling lands on my hands in slow motion.

I let my legs and arms bend to absorb the impact and expect myself to fall to the ground because of the weight.

I don't.

The weight is excruciating and my rib is digging into my lung now, making me groan in pain.

But the ceiling doesn't crush the Avengers, or myself, and I can't help but feel proud to have saved their lives.

"Just hold on a little longer," Steve calls out concerned.

I nod my head, having my eyes squeezed shut in pain.

"Cap, do you think you can take Spidey's place holding the ceiling?" Tony asks.

"I don't think so, the weight of the ceiling will crush me, I'm not strong enough," he replies.

"But Son of Rogers, you are the strongest midgardian I know," Thor states disbelievingly.

"Well not anymore, Goldilocks," Tony jokes, despite the worry evident in his voice.

My shattered wrist is practically doing nothing but screaming in protest, as Natasha finally gets out of the octopus tentacle and starts helping Clint out of his too.

"Get out of here," I huff.

"Don't worry, we'll get you out too," Steve replies sternly, desperately trying to break the tentacle trapping him.

I nod, though not really believing it and having already accepted my fate.

Suddenly my broken leg gives in slightly and my body moves with a start, making the ceiling crumble and the rib poking at my lung dig in hard.

Yelping out in pain, I feel blood clog up in my lung making it harder to breath.

I start violently coughing up blood onto the floor and shaking from the pain.

Burning.

That's all I feel.

All of my insides feel alight with fire and pain.

I have never felt anything quite like it and I have felt a lot of different types of pain, both physical and mental.

The bullet wound I got when fighting Doc Conners felt slightly similar, yet so much better.

The bullet wound burned and felt strange in my leg, but that was the thing, it was just in my leg.

I look down at the floor again and see a pool of blood.

I groan before being overwhelmed by another coughing fit and spitting up more blood than I knew was in my body.

Black spots dance across my vision and I start to feel lightheaded, "Please... hurry up..." I choke out between coughs.

After freeing Clint, Natasha turns to look at me and notices the blood.

"Are you okay?" she asks.

"Absolutely perfect," I cough.

"Let's just pretend I buy that," she turns around and runs over to Tony to help him out.

Clint has already gotten Thor and Steve out and they are trying to find a way to get me out from under the ceiling.

"Leave me," I groan as my lung digs deeper.

"Never," Clint replies, "Who would I play Mario Cart with then?"

I try to laugh but it comes out as more choking up blood.

 _I'll never be able to convince them to leave me._

 _How would I be able to get out?_

 _My webbing is strong but you can't really turn it into a pole and use it to take my place._

 _I just need something to hold it up long enough so that I can run, more like limp, out._

My arms are starting to ache and I wobble under the weight slightly.

 _Maybe if I can get someone to web the ceiling to the wall, that should hold it, at least long enough._

 _I just hope I have enough web fluid in my web shooter left._

"I have an idea," I choke out remembering the burning pain.

All the Avengers look at me expectingly as they are all free from the tentacles.

"Cap... take my web shooter... and web the ceiling... to the walls..." I instruct, coughing up blood in between words.

I take a ragged breath in, chocking on the blood in my lungs and trying to exchange it for much needed air.

Cap nods and comes up to me, taking the web shooter off of my wrist and trying to aim it at the edges of he ceiling.

"Why cap?" Clint asks.

Cap replies in between trying to the shoot web fluid, "I think you need super strength."

I nod after another violent coughing fit, "Everyone... else get... out..."

They nod their heads and walk towards the exit, eyeing the two heroes on their way out.

"How much of this stuff should I put?" Cap asks.

"All of... it..." I reply desperately.

"Okay," Cap starts quickly shooting the web fluid at the ceiling.

Once he is finished he rushes towards me, "You think this will hold it?"

"For... long enough..." I cough, "I'm... letting go..."

After he nods his approval I start slowly lowering my arms until I am applying no pressure to ceiling.

I collapse to the floor, having already used all of my strength.

Steve rushes closer to me and lifts me in his arms bridal style.

I groan in pain at the movement but let him run out the door as the ceiling starts to crack and crumble.

We rush out of the door and finally stop running.

Steve turns to look at the warehouse and we see it fall into dust and debris.

Then, carefully now, he makes his way into the, now parked near the warehouse, quinjet with me still in his arms.

He lays me in his seat and I groan and choke up more blood.

Bruce rushes towards me, "Are you okay? Let me do a checkup."

"Whatever you say... Doc," I reply trying to seem okay, but the blood I'm chocking up seems to have other ideas.

"Hmm, your rib seems to be puncturing you lung," Bruce replies quick and concerned after a moment or two, "It's making blood go into your lung, hence you choking up blood."

I nod already having guessed that.

"We need to get you to Stark Tower medical bay fast, we have proper equipment their, for now you should rest, we'll figure it out."

I nod again, and smile slightly, "Worst eighteenth... birthday ever," I cough before blacking out.


	16. Chapter 16

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

I hear voices.

They're blurry and unfocused, as if I am in an underwater cave.

The voices seem far away and strange yet they also echo.

My eyelids seem heavy like tons of weight and I can't bring myself to open them, but I can listen and try to understand what's going on.

No matter how hard I try I can't seem to remember what happened.

"How long do you think it will take?"

"I don't know, he's been out for two hours I would expect him at least out for a day, but he has some sort of healing factor so it's hard to guess."

 _They're talking about me, I think so anyway._

I groan as I finally regain feeling and notice the pain.

My right leg is in a large amount of pain, but it is bearable, same with my left wrist.

However, the pain in my lung isn't exactly what I would call bearable.

 _What happened?_

 _And why is it so hard for me to remember?_

 _Where am I?_

I groan again whilst I try to lift my eyelids, only to have bright light shining in.

I flutter them closed and try to squint and see my surroundings.

"He's awake, Jarvis dim lights 25%."

The lights dim enough to open my eyes comfortably and so I open them only to come face to face with Bruce.

The memories come flooding back.

 _The Avengers._

 _Harry._

 _Aunt May._

 _The warehouse._

 _The falling ceiling._

 _Saving their lives._

"How are you feeling?" Bruce asks.

"Fine," I reply automatically, making Bruce frown.

That's when I notice Clint also in the room.

"Don't lie, how are you really feeling," he asks.

"Like a building collapsed on top of me," I croak out, "Oh wait, that did happen."

Clint let's out a chuckle and shakes his head, "You really scared us, you know?"

I smile, "It's gonna take a lot more than a falling ceiling to stop me."

"Yeah, but if you fight Rhino, Doc Ock, Vulture and Goblin, and then have a building fall on top of you, well let's just say it isn't pretty," Clint argues.

I sigh, but can't help but smile slightly.

"Jarvis, please inform the other Avengers that Peter woke up," Bruce interrupts.

"Of course Dr. Banner," the robotic voice of Jarvis replies.

The room is enveloped in a comfortable silence.

I can finally relax for a moment, no longer have to worry about my identity.

I suppose not much has changed, but I feel a sense of relief.

 _The Avengers wouldn't leave me to die in the warehouse, that means they must care at least a bit._

Before my thoughts can continue Tony bursts through the door shouting in a singsong voice, "He's alive! He's alive!"

I let a laugh escape my lips and the corners of my mouth twitch up.

"Was there ever a doubt?" I ask.

"It should be no, as you have super healing, but any normal person would have been dead the second they started coughing up blood, so you can say we were worried," replied Tony.

I smile again, this all just seems so perfect.

 _Wait, what happened to Aunt May?_

"Where's my Aunt?" I ask, hoping they didn't leave her in the subway train.

"Right here."

I turn my head towards the door to see Aunt May walking in, Steve by her side and the other Avengers toeing behind.

She walks to side of my bed and holds my right hand, knowing that my left is in pain.

"How are you feeling?" she asks.

"Not that bad," I smile as a reply.

"You know we have to talk about this right? The whole Spider-man thing."

I nod.

"Are you feeling up to it now?" she asks calmly.

I sigh, I don't really feel like answering questions but I suppose there is no time like the present.

"I guess," I reply.

"Okay then, how?"

"You know dad worked for Oscorp?" I wait to receive a nod before continuing, "Well he created these genetically altered spiders, however, dad found out that Oscorp was going to use the spiders to create dangerous soldiers, so dad destroyed as much work as he could and added his DNA to the spiders, then he left to destroy the last of the work, he managed to destroy it but he and mum died due to a killer on the plane."

"Okay but that doesn't explain how you got powers," May points out.

"Well," I laugh sheepishly, "I kind of snuck into Oscorp and found my way into the spiders room, then one bit me and since I have some of dad's DNA it bonded with my DNA and gave me powers."

Aunt May nods at that and smiles, "Is that how you broke the basketball backboard?"

"Uncle Ben wasn't meant to tell you!" I exclaim.

"I figured it out," she smiles.

I laugh.

"But why did you become Spider-man?" Natasha asks, startling me and reminding me Aunt May and I aren't alone.

"Oh well, one night me and my Uncle had an argument that was all my fault, I ran out of the house and to a store, I tried to buy something but I didn't have enough money, someone robbed the store, I let him go and then he killed my Uncle. Uncle Ben told me that with great power comes great responsibility. It's pretty much the same as what Harry said," I sigh at the memory of my Uncle's death.

 _It was all my fault._

I shake my head of those thoughts and try to think of something else.

"You've had it rough," Clint notes.

"Yeah, how old are you anyway?" Steve asks, "You said something about eighteenth Birthday before you fell unconscious."

"Yup, I'm officially eighteen today."

"How long have you been the child of spiders?" Thor asks.

"About three years now," I reply.

"You started when you were fifteen?" Tony asks disbelievingly.

"Yes, though I also spent a few months looking for my Uncle's killer without a mask."

"Okay, well you should probably go back to sleep now, I'm sure you're still in pain," Bruce says, shoving everyone out of the door except Aunt May.

"Goodnight Peter, and happy Birthday," my Aunt says rubbing circles on my hand.

For the first time in a while, I smile a genuine smile as I close my eyes and loose consciousness.


	17. Chapter 17

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

I open my eyes with a sigh, a sweet blissful sigh.

I'm still in the medical bay.

I turn to look at a clock but don't find one.

"Jarvis, what's the time?" I ask.

"It is currently 8:26 am." Jarvis replies.

Huh, must have slept till the next day.

I move the sheets covering my injuries to inspect their healing.

My left wrist is still in a sort of cast-brace-thing so I unwrap it and stare at the damage.

My wrist was put in place yesterday and I can see my healing factor taking action.

That's what surprises me, my healing factor hasn't worked in months.

 _Maybe it's because the Avengers are feeding me better, even though I seemed to stop them from feeding me completely properly, or maybe it's just because I'm happy, either way, it's something good._

I smile and put the cast-brace-thing back on.

Then I avert my eyes to my right leg and am pleased to see it in a cast.

 _Something I don't have to make up a word for._

Taking it off expertly, I examine the damage and, like my other injuries, can see that it is clearly healing well and working in sync with my healing factor.

After placing the cast back on I remember some of my other fatal injuries, my ribs an lung.

I carefully take off the bandage around my ribs and start lightly poking to see the damage.

It's healed a lot and so I try to test out my lung.

I take a deep breath and feel for any pain.

I feel only the slightest, and my throat is slightly aching.

 _My healing factor must have worked the hardest to fix my lung._

I spend the next few minutes looking at minor injuries and once I am satisfied that I'll be fine I ask Jarvis where the others are at.

"The Avengers and Mrs Parker are in the common room. I could inform Mr Banner of your awakening," the robotic voice replies.

"You don't need to tell Bruce, I've already checked my injuries, just, is there anyway I could go to the common room, like maybe a wheelchair?" I ask.

"Yes Mr Parker, I shall send one your way, just a moment," Jarvis answers.

A moment later, just like Jarvis said, a square in the wall is sucked inside and a wheelchair is rolled through, the wall then closes itself.

"Of course the wall can move, it's Tony Stark who built it," I say to no one.

I place my hands on the wheelchair and heave myself onto it, luckily due to my spider strength it isn't much of a problem.

Whilst getting used to controlling the wheelchair, I wheel my way to the elevator and ask to go up to the common room.

When the elevator doors open I find seven pairs of eyes staring my way.

I give an awkward wave, "Hey..."

My Aunt May jumps up from the couch, that her and all the Avengers were sitting on, over to me and hugs me, then lets go and the scolding begins.

"You're meant to be in bed mister, what if you were to rip your stitches, or even worse, damage your lung again, don't you dare do that again! Especially without telling anyone!" Aunt May finishes her speech with a smile, "Now, I made pie."

I can hear Bruce whispering to Clint, "I thought I would have to do that."

Clint chuckles and replies, "You medical people always scolding."

Bruce shakes his head playfully.

 _How did they know Aunt May used to be a nurse?_

 _Oh stop worrying she obviously told them during a conversation or something._

Aunt May moves over to the kitchen counter and picks up a delicious looking pie.

"According to the Avengers, you haven't been eating well, so you are to eat this pie," my aunt announces.

"All of the pie, what about everyone else?" I ask unbelievingly.

"I have more pies," she smiles a bright smile, which I can't help but return.

She sets the pie onto the coffee table separating the TV from the couch.

"Eat," she demands.

She leaves for the kitchen once more and I wheel my wheelchair next to the couch and start eating as instructed.

Aunt May comes back with three more pies, "I'm hoping this will be enough."

She sets a pie down on Steve's lap, and the other two on the coffee table, "Eat up everyone."

Tony grabs a knife and easily cuts himself a big slice of pie, along with one for everyone else except Steve and I, who each have our own.

"Mmmmm, this is soooo good Mrs Parker," Tony states after a few minutes of everyone hungrily gobbling down her pie.

"Why thank you," she says back.

"I must get the recipe!" Tony exclaims.

"I am flattered that you like my pie that much Mr Stark, but it is a secret family recipe,"she says shutting him down.

"But I... It's just... I'm Tony Stark, genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist! I get everything," he argues back, not understanding that that doesn't matter to Aunt May.

"And I am May Parker, an amazing, spectacular, superior, superhero's aunt. I don't care," everyone in the room, except Peter who is just laughing, stares at Aunt May not understanding how she could simply turn Tony down with sass better than his.

Everyone in the room can't resist anymore and soon people are rolling around on the floor laughing.

"Ok, I'll admit that was funny, but the joke is over, can I have it now?" Tony asks after chuckling quietly.

"I was being serious Mr Stark."

"But... noooooo!" Tony drops onto the floor dramatically.

More laughs are spread around the room and everyone settles on the couch again.

"Movie marathon?" Clint suggests with a cheeky grin.

Nods are shared and discussions, actually mostly arguments, held before we come to a final, important conclusion.

We're watching Star Wars.


	18. Chapter 18

**I do not own these characters, Marvel and Sony do.**

I smile as I open my eyes, I must have fallen asleep during the second movie.

 _I guess a little extra sleep whilst recovering is good._

I cast my eyes around the room, I'm the only one here.

 _Where are they?_

 _Did they go to bed?_

 _Wouldn't they bring me to mine?_

 _I suppose they didn't want to wake me up, but I'm in a wheelchair, they could have easily wheeled me to my room._

Shaking my head to be rid of the thoughts, I pump my arms again the wheels, moving myself over to the lift.

The lift's doors open and I go inside.

"What floor are the Avengers on, Jarvis?" I ask.

"The Avengers are currently on floor 87, shall I take you there?" the famous AI known as Jarvis replies.

 _I wonder what's on that floor._

"Yes, that would be helpful," I answer.

"Very well."

I can barely feel the lift moving, but know from experience that it is.

The doors open, only to come to an empty room.

I wheel myself forward sceptically, knowing something is unusual.

Then my spidey-sense tingles.

I smile, already knowing what's about to happen.

"Surprise!!!" everyone yells as they come out from their hiding spots.

My smile only grows when I spot the Avengers, Aunt May, Flash and a load of other people I think used to go to Midtown High, or I met once or twice.

Thor is the first one to approach me.

"A happy Birthday I hoped you had, my friend," I smile at him trying to say 'I hope you had a happy Birthday,' but twisting it around like he always does.

Flash then comes forwards.

"Now I understand what complicated means, you live with the Avengers, that is so cool! Have you met Spidey? I heard he's been hanging around the Avengers lately, you know, stopping the Green Goblin and his super villain team."

I laugh at his enthusiasm, he always was Spidey's biggest fan.

"No, I haven't met Spider-Man," Flash's smile falls slightly, "yet," I add to make Flash happy, it works.

"If you do, it would be amazing if you told him his biggest fan, Flash Thompson, says hi."

"I'll be sure to mention it," I smile again, so many smiles and everything has barely started.

Next I make my way to the Avengers' little circle, "So you threw me a late birthday party," I say, and even though it wasn't a question Tony replies.

"Of course we did, you're eighteen, that has to be celebrated!" Tony waves his arms around crazily, and I wonder if he's purposely trying to look stupid, but decide not to ask.

"We weren't sure who to invite though, I hope there's no one missing," Bruce adds unsure.

"It's fine Bruce, I don't really have a lot of friends, only Flash, and I used to be his punching bag, so it's kind of awkward," I smile again.

Steve frowns deeply, "You were bullied?"

"Well, I was Puny Parker after all," I say trying to lighten the mood.

"What about after the spider powers?" Steve continues.

"Then I showed off my powers and showed him up in basketball, then I got in trouble, learned that with great power comes great responsibility, and so then I was his punching bag again," I explain.

"But you never punched him back?" Tony asks confused.

"Then I'd be as bad as him, besides, if I couldn't do it then, then I shouldn't do it now," I smile again, trying to put an end to an awkward conversation.

"But you let yourself get hurt, just so you'd keep your identity a secret?" Steve asks raising his voice slightly.

The Avengers except Steve and Tony take a step back.

"Also to not be as bad as him," I add without raising my voice like the others.

"Who's side are you on? Flash's?" Tony asks me.

"Seriously guys, calm down, that was a while ago, it's ok," I say using the sturdiest voice I can muster, after all, I am telling the Avengers what to do.

"Your right, I just hate bullies, hurting people for no reason," Steve frowns.

"He was abused at home by his father, he took his anger out on me, I know that's not a good reason, but it is still a reason, he's better now, he understands that what he did was wrong and he's making up for it," I smile and look over Steve's shoulder at Flash talking to old Midtown students, "Now he's my friend."

Steve sighs, clearly not liking it but letting it go.

"Alcohol anyone?" Tony asks taking a bottle of wine out from nowhere to change the conversation.

"You realise I just turned eighteen right? Not twenty-one," I say lowering my smile slightly, just to show I'm not going to try it.

"But come on! I had my first drink when I was like... a long time ago!" Tony exclaims after his pause.

"No," I state sternly.

"But..."

"No."

"Just..."

"No."

"Maybe..."

"Noooooo."

"Fine," he mutters after I finish stretching my 'o'.

"Besides, I doubt you'll even be able to get me drunk," I add.

"That sounds like a challenge!" Tony jumps with enthusiasm.

"No, it's not, it's just me stating that because I have such a high metabolism I won't be able to get drunk," I explain.

"But Steve has a high metabolism and he still got drunk once, I had to give him like all my alcohol but it happened!" Tony argues happily.

In response I turn to Steve.

"How much Advil do you take when you get a headache?" I ask to prove a point.

"About five, why?" he asks in return.

"I don't even bother because no matter how much I take, it just doesn't do anything," I explain.

Tony gives me a blank look so I continue, "That means that I have a higher metabolism than Steve, so I'll need more alcohol than Steve, much more, so don't even bother," I smile as I explain my point.

Tony pouts, "Can't I at least try?"

"No."

"But..."

"No."

"Just..."

"No."

"Maybe..."

"Noooooo."

"Fine."

I can't hold in my laughter so it comes out as a chuckle, the other Avengers laugh with me at the replica of an already had conversation.

Flash soon walks over to our little group, wanting to talk with the Avengers, Aunt May soon follows, we spend the whole night talking, laughing and smiling so much our cheeks hurt.

I know that everything isn't perfect yet, and it probably never will be, but I know that things will get better, and that's all I can ever ask for...

The End


	19. Extra

_One month later..._

I open my eyes in a snap, sitting up and looking at my sweat soaked clothes.

I sigh in frustration, _not again._

Nightmares are a common occurrence, but now I have people to help me deal with them.

I spring out of my bed and land onto the floor.

Moving to the window I can't help but smile a bright smile at the view and the memories.

Ever since the Harry situation, Aunt May and I have been living with the Avengers.

They're great people and I'm glad that I finally have people I can relate with.

I walk through the door and towards the elevator, heading to the common room.

Once arriving there I notice I'm the last to come, except for Aunt May who is going shopping with colleagues.

"Peter, the machine of beans is broken," Thor announces standing by the coffee machine.

"Why me?" I ask playfully.

"Well I'm busy making popcorn, Bruce is writing another thesis, and everyone else is too lazy to help," Steve adds on the other side of the counter, using the microwave to pop the corn.

"What we watching?" I ask as I help Thor make coffee, "and since when do you drink coffee Thor?"

"I decided to try the famous drink."

"We're watching Lord Of The Rings!" Tony announces from the couch.

"Nooooo! We have to watch The Hobbit first!" Clint cries out.

"Okay, who votes for Lord Of The Rings?" Bruce asks, giving up on his writing.

Tony is the only one to raise his hand.

"Ha!" Clint laughs out, "we're watching The Hobbit!"

"But I control Jarvis!" Tony says grinning evilly.

A small smiles tugs at the corners of my mouth.

"Jarvis put on Lord Of The Rings," Tony directs.

"Of course sir," Tony's artificial intelligence replies.

"Jarvis don't listen to Tony, put on The Hobbit," I smirk.

Everyone looks at me in confusion, except for Steve who has some recognition.

"Okay, Peter," Jarvis replies and The Hobbit starts playing.

Tony looks at the ceiling in betrayal.

"What?!" he then switches his direction to me, "what did you do?!"

It was at that moment I burst out laughing, and Clint was close behind.

After a few seconds I caught my breath, "I may have hacked Jarvis."

Clint continues to laugh, and even Steve and Bruce snicker slightly at the look on Tony's face.

Natasha just claps at my achievement to make Tony utterly shocked, and Thor shouts out something about how 'the man in the wall' likes me more.

"When?!" Tony seriously seems to be in a state of shock.

"When I first got to the tower, but I hack it often to see how it works," I shrug.

Tony just gapes at me.

Everyone moves onto the couch as Steve goes and brings out the popcorn.

Tony continues to have his mouth wide open, that is, until Clint makes it his personal mission to throw popcorn into said mouth, and as we know, Clint never misses.

It's at that moment when Tony finally snaps out of it.

"Jarvis, put on Lord Of The Rings!" Tony whines, but he knows it's no use.

"I'm afraid Peter's orders come before yours," Jarvis says.

"But I created you!" he exclaims.

He continues to complain throughout the movie, until about halfway through he comes to his senses and enjoys it as well.

Once the movie finished Tony looks at me, "I congratulate you on hacking my creation, but just you wait, I'll gain control again!"

It's a day later when Tony fixes Jarvis, but then a week later when I hack it again.

Soon a full blown war commences, and no one has control for long.

Clint makes sure to always bring out the popcorn, and Steve leaves as soon as Tony and I start talking about how we hacked or fixed Jarvis.

It's interesting to say the least.

This was suggested by a guest review.


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